HJCotton.net

I read a newspaper article in the Pocono Record about a Stroudsburg area pool that was closed down 3 times over the course of a weekend. The cause each time? Lifeguards on duty spotted what they called “a solid”. I can only imagine the scene when a lifeguard yelled for everyone to get out of the water; swimmers furiously paddling away from a turd in the center of the pool as if they were re-enacting that famous beach scene from Jaws. Everyone looks like they’re going to make it out except one small child with those floaty arm bands, who lies helplessly splashing in the center of the pool, unable to escape the achingly slow approach of the “solid”. Parents are screaming and holding their children tight, while the mother of the helpless little one in the pool paces back and forth across concrete, looking for her child in the ensuing chaos. After a few moments fruitlessly searching for her daughter, she spots her in the center of the pool. The turd is moving in fast – and the mother realizes that there isn’t single thing she can do. Things seem to move in slow motion for her now. It’s just about to touch her arm; parents turn their children towards them to shield their eyes from the approaching carnage… and out of the blue a pool cleaning net piloted by a lifeguard saves the child from certain death by scooping away the offending entity.

At least that’s the way I saw things going down.